The Amphi Mentality Test (Repost)

A

amphipoda

Guest
Another oldy, but a goodie...
Date: Wed, 12 Apr 2000 15:55:45

There such a thing as an "Amphi Mentality" and
I've made it possible to quantify. Grab a calculator
to keep score, get inside your Amphi, and take this
simple 10 question test to determine your Amphi
Mentality rating.

1. When it comes to your paycheck, you:
(10 pts) Invest it in Amphicar R&D ventures
(5 pts) Put it in savings for future Amphi repairs
(2 pts) Spend some on Amphi, some on beer
(1 pt) Shoot the wad on Amphi immediately

2. Your Amphi gift-giving philosophy is;
(10 pts) Get Amphi something needed/functional
(5 pts) Give Amphi a card or a little something
(2 pts) Money's no object when it comes to Amphi
(1 pt) Anything on sale at Gordon Imports

3. Your Amphi behavior resembles which of the
following songs:
(10 pts) Theme song from Titanic movie
(5 pts) "Anchors Aweigh"
(2 pts) "How dry I am... how wet I'll be.."
(1 pt) "Splish -Splash... takin' a bath"

4. You win the lottery. You use the money for:
(10 pts) A savings account for Amphi's education
(5 pts) Be practical - pay Gordon Imports debts
(2 pts) Something extravagant, (another Amphi)
(1 pt) Build a massive lake in your backyard

5. While E-Bay shopping, you spot an Amphi
trinket that you absolutely must own. The
down side -- it's way out of your budget.
You decide to:
(10 pts) Under bid and get religion
(5 pts) Dip into Amphi's education savings
(2 pts) Max out your spouse's credit cards
(1 pt) Take out a mortgage on Amphi

6. When your Amphi is sick, you:
(10 pts) Cry & consult amphibious counseling
(5 pts) Post pathetic pleas on the Amphi digest
(2 pts) Mooch Amphi rides from fellow Amphis'
(1 pt) Stuff a propeller in your arse and swim
around

7. Of the following, what is the first thing you
look for when choosing an Amphi playmate?
(10 pts) Combination of Looks & Money
(5 pts) Easy access to a large body of water
(2 pts) Knowledge of Amphi repairs
(1 pt) Lots and lots and lots of spare parts

8. The typical Summer Saturday would most
likely be spent:
(10 pts) Repairing Amphi for a future swim
(5 pts) Watching old Amphi Swim-In club videos
(2 pts) Basking in the glory that which is Amphi
(1 pt) Chasing fresh water mermaids in Amphi

9. Your Amphi is invited to a party, but you aren't.
Your reaction is:
(10 pts) Tell host Amphi is sick and go in its place
(5 pts) Convince Amphi your party will be better
(2 pts) Call the Park Patrol to disperse their party
(1 pt) Dress up like an Amphi and crash the party

10. Which of the following activities would you
most like to do with your Amphi?
(10 pts) Explore the Louisiana swamps for some
characters from the movie Deliverance
(5 pts) Ferry Playboy Playmates across your pool
(2 pts) Play a game of Chicken at Niagra Falls
(1 pt) Bring Alien Gonzolas back to Cuba

**** Score Results as follows: ****
60 to 100 Severe character flaws, need to loosen
up and enjoy your toys more.
40 to 59 Have pretty serious issues to resolve,
would benefit from some high speed
water entries.
20 to 39 Some childhood trauma has tainted your
judgement, consider aqua therapy.
15 to 19 There is hope for you yet, but you
haven't attained full Amphi gills.
10 to 14 You are the sort of amphibian I want
to party with at Celina!


Amphipoda
'64 Turquoise
San Diego, CA
 
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