A
amphipoda
Guest
Hibernating Amphi Test? (HAT)
All those January swim comments got me
pondering... again. Hibernation is one of
those things I reckon we should consider
as a part of amphibious life. Amphibians
in the wild certainly hibernate, but come
to think of it... the amphibians at the SD
zoo don't hibernate. Curious isn't it?
Obviously the blessed Sunbelt Amphis frolic
year round and never give much thought to
a chilly 60 degree winter swim, but what
about our Northern brethren? After an
exhaustive conversation with my Amphi,
who somehow knows these things, we
developed this simple Hibernating Amphi
Test (H.A.T.) to see if your Amphi is
asleep for the winter.
1) Does your Amphi's heartbeat seem
unusually slow? Borrow your doctors
stethoscope and slip it against the fuel
pump... listen for a steady sinus rhythm
without inflicting tremendous harm to
the stethoscope or yourself.
2) Are your Amphi's holiday presents
still unwrapped and bundled at Amphi's
wheels? Unwrapped presents are a good
indication Amphi is sound asleep.
3) Does your Amphi ignore the dinner
call? Typically an Amphi eats 3 square
meals a day and is said to "never be late
for dinner."
4) Has a snow bank completely engulfed
your Amphi? This is cause for alarm as a
snow encapsulated Amphi may be either
hibernating or in a coma. Do the right
thing and provide adequate shelter during
winter months.
5) If you have more than one Amphi, or
other classic vehicles, are the Amphis
snuggled up close to share warmth? This
is a good indication you need a larger
garage and/or your Amphi is awake and
friggin' cold. (Refer to #7 below)
6) Are your Amphi's wheels frozen solid
to the ground? Here again is cause for
concern as frost bitten extremities may
require amputation. (Refer to #4 above).
7) If you notice your Amphi shivering in
cold weather then I recommend you insert
a thermometer* in Amphi's tail pipe and take
a reading. A shivering Amphi in temperatures
below freezing indicate your Amphi needs a cave
or some other nook to sleep off the bitter cold.
Note: Any parallel to zoo creature hibernation
and your Amphi may or may not be coincidental
depending upon your geographic locality and/or
climatic conditions. *The poster of this message
assumes no responsibility for anyone who
substitutes their tongue as a thermometer.
Be well, swim safe.
Amphipoda
`64 Turquoise
San Diego, CA
All those January swim comments got me
pondering... again. Hibernation is one of
those things I reckon we should consider
as a part of amphibious life. Amphibians
in the wild certainly hibernate, but come
to think of it... the amphibians at the SD
zoo don't hibernate. Curious isn't it?
Obviously the blessed Sunbelt Amphis frolic
year round and never give much thought to
a chilly 60 degree winter swim, but what
about our Northern brethren? After an
exhaustive conversation with my Amphi,
who somehow knows these things, we
developed this simple Hibernating Amphi
Test (H.A.T.) to see if your Amphi is
asleep for the winter.
1) Does your Amphi's heartbeat seem
unusually slow? Borrow your doctors
stethoscope and slip it against the fuel
pump... listen for a steady sinus rhythm
without inflicting tremendous harm to
the stethoscope or yourself.
2) Are your Amphi's holiday presents
still unwrapped and bundled at Amphi's
wheels? Unwrapped presents are a good
indication Amphi is sound asleep.
3) Does your Amphi ignore the dinner
call? Typically an Amphi eats 3 square
meals a day and is said to "never be late
for dinner."
4) Has a snow bank completely engulfed
your Amphi? This is cause for alarm as a
snow encapsulated Amphi may be either
hibernating or in a coma. Do the right
thing and provide adequate shelter during
winter months.
5) If you have more than one Amphi, or
other classic vehicles, are the Amphis
snuggled up close to share warmth? This
is a good indication you need a larger
garage and/or your Amphi is awake and
friggin' cold. (Refer to #7 below)
6) Are your Amphi's wheels frozen solid
to the ground? Here again is cause for
concern as frost bitten extremities may
require amputation. (Refer to #4 above).
7) If you notice your Amphi shivering in
cold weather then I recommend you insert
a thermometer* in Amphi's tail pipe and take
a reading. A shivering Amphi in temperatures
below freezing indicate your Amphi needs a cave
or some other nook to sleep off the bitter cold.
Note: Any parallel to zoo creature hibernation
and your Amphi may or may not be coincidental
depending upon your geographic locality and/or
climatic conditions. *The poster of this message
assumes no responsibility for anyone who
substitutes their tongue as a thermometer.
Be well, swim safe.
Amphipoda
`64 Turquoise
San Diego, CA
