Began Celina packing and remembered this...

A

Amphipoda

Guest
Amphi Medical Tips (repost)
Date: Fri, 20 Oct 2000 12:14:11

In an Amphi medical emergency, knowing what
to do can make all the difference. Here are some
tips to help you handle an unexpected Amphi injury
or illness:

~ Maintain a fully inflated life preserver on board
at all times. Note: A life size inflatable doll makes
a good commuter lane companion as well as vibrant
aquatic life preserver.

~ Keep a first-aid kit in your Amphi's glove box.
It should contain alcohol (both rubbing & drinking),
cotton balls, Jar-Jar Band-Aids, Suntan Lotion (SPF
15+), and a map of Ohio.

~ Always keep plenty of gauze on board in case you
invent an invisibility potion. Gauze should also be
used to cover Amphi's eyes, as Amphi can't stand
the sight of blood.

~ Make sure your first-aid kit contains a large,
frilly Victorian fan to revive fainting victims.

~ If a person requires artificial respiration, and
you are of the same sex as the person, and no one
of the opposite sex is around to perform the life
saving procedure, you have the option to cross-
dress for the occasion.

~ Administering CPR is easy. Just do it like you saw
them do on TV that one time. As a rule of thumb,
always ask yourself this question: "What would
Randolph Mantooth do?"

~ To stop a nosebleed, apply pressure. To start a
nosebleed, apply even greater pressure in short,
repeated bursts.

~ Have a carrier pigeon handy for contacting the
paramedics. Cell phones should not be used since
they cost too much to operate and coverage in
Celina is spotty at best.

~ If possible, try to be the guy who tells the victim,
"Everything's going to be all right," while others do
the actual work.

~ If you did all you could and the victim still dies,
pat him or her down for a Snickers bar. It's not like
you don't deserve one. Also check for spare Amphi
parts since the dearly departed won't be needing
them anymore.

Brought to you as an Amphibious Public Service
Announcement by yours truly...

Amphipoda
`64 Turquoise
San Diego, CA
 
Thread starter Similar threads Forum Replies Date
mike_israel Celina 2019 Swim-In General Amphicar Discussion 1
strandweiss62 Celina 2003 on Youtube General Amphicar Discussion 3
mike_israel Celina Update from IAOC General Amphicar Discussion 1
SNOWBIRD Red 62 to Celina General Amphicar Discussion 0
B Celina Amphicar Record General Amphicar Discussion 3
Midwest Amphicar Celina !!! Excitement!! General Amphicar Discussion 2
mike_israel Celina Swim-In Update General Amphicar Discussion 1
MAE 8 injured after possible tornado in Celina, Ohio General Amphicar Discussion 0
T 100 Amphicars in Celina 2018 General Amphicar Discussion 5
SNOWBIRD CELINA 2017 General Amphicar Discussion 4
Midwest Amphicar How was Celina? General Amphicar Discussion 6
SNOWBIRD CELINA General Amphicar Discussion 3
LSolheim Post Celina (was "Prepping for Celina") General Amphicar Discussion 5
mike_israel Celina 2014 Swim-In Info General Amphicar Discussion 2
Midwest Amphicar Celina a go go, good time General Amphicar Discussion 1
Midwest Amphicar Celina? General Amphicar Discussion 2
BuckeyeFloater Celina General Amphicar Discussion 1
J ImaBoat for sale or loan during Celina! General Amphicar Discussion 9
Akamphi Celina 2012 General Amphicar Discussion 1
MAE Celina 2011 General Amphicar Discussion 5
mike_israel [Jul 22, 2011] Celina 2011 - The National Swim In (Celina, OH) General Amphicar Discussion 0
Midwest Amphicar No Celina this year for The Waves General Amphicar Discussion 2
mike_israel Who is going to Celina 2011? General Amphicar Discussion 0
BuckeyeFloater Back from Celina General Amphicar Discussion 6
inaintheboro Here at Celina, Ohio General Amphicar Discussion 8
Ed Price Update On Celina Water Problems General Amphicar Discussion 3
Ed Price Celina Hotels General Amphicar Discussion 0
SNOWBIRD Celina 2010 General Amphicar Discussion 6
Midwest Amphicar Can it be ready for Celina? General Amphicar Discussion 0
T Celina was great. General Amphicar Discussion 4
amphigill Celina General Amphicar Discussion 2
Midwest Amphicar Bats at Celina General Amphicar Discussion 3
DavidC Amphicars in Celina parade. General Amphicar Discussion 2
MAE Westlake Villas in Celina General Amphicar Discussion 0
Midwest Amphicar Grand Pa Wave will be a no show @ Celina General Amphicar Discussion 3
Midwest Amphicar Trying to get floating for Celina General Amphicar Discussion 1
Midwest Amphicar Celina Celina Celina General Amphicar Discussion 6
Cruiserduck ***URGENT Rooms Avialable - Celina Holiday Inn General Amphicar Discussion 0
T Celina - Celina - Celina General Amphicar Discussion 8
Canadian four amphs Celina General Amphicar Discussion 1
Midwest Amphicar Celina extra bed/ floor ....Help General Amphicar Discussion 2
R 2008 Celina Swim In General Amphicar Discussion 4
T Any Texans going to Celina? General Amphicar Discussion 0
P Celina swim-in hotels General Amphicar Discussion 0
P Celina Swim-In Schedule 2008 General Amphicar Discussion 11
Midwest Amphicar Celina General Amphicar Discussion 0
D rotors Club gift? Celina white amphi ebay Ozark Ts lipstick General Amphicar Discussion 1
A Celina Kudos General Amphicar Discussion 1
L Schedule for Celina Activities General Amphicar Discussion 0
T Celina, When all is said and done, there is nothing... General Amphicar Discussion 0
Similar threads


















































Top