A
Amphipoda
Guest
I declare January 27th an IAOC International holiday? it's my
birthday! I'm approaching the crest of "the hill" with the speed and
determination as if I were already on some steep ramp downward into a
magnificent watery splash. Now that I'll be of "age" (able to
formulate my own opinion without actually thinking), I want to clear
up a few things that have been mildly nagging at me for years, like a
scratch that never itched.
First ? the name Amphipoda is routinely butchered by many. It's
pronounced "Am-fee-pod-uh." I'm cool with Apoda or even Poda, but
calling me Ipod makes me blow chuncks. Way too trendy!
Second ? When something gets an Amphipoda spin, it is Amphipoda-ized
or under goes apodization. (i.e., when stopping your car, if you
reduce the brake pedal force just as you come to a stop, you will not
feel a "jerk" [or look like one] and the car will come to a smooth
stop. This is a form of apodization.). If you want something
apodized - just ask. I'm so chock full of BS my eyes are brown and
my nictitating membranes are pitch black.
Third ? I spend an incredible amount of time not doing the things
that nobody had ever thought of not doing. This is what makes me so
incredibly impractical on a good day and down right "finatical" on an
average day. Surly you realize what a saint my Mermaid wife is by
now.
And last ? In order to properly commemorate and celebrate this new
holiday I ask that each of you, in your own unique way, fill your
navel with the seeds of your favorite fruit and run buck naked
through the streets of the closest major metropolitan city
yelling "Happy Birthday Amphipoda!!!"? weather permitting of course.
And if that's just too much of a hassle please make a silent toast in
the direction of the nearest Amphicar.
Oh, and by all means tell your boss January 27th is an IAOC
International holiday and that you get the day off with pay.
Be well, swim safe.
Amphipoda (Am-fee-pod-uh)
'64 Turquoise (still not wet in 2006)
San Diego, CA (72 degrees)
birthday! I'm approaching the crest of "the hill" with the speed and
determination as if I were already on some steep ramp downward into a
magnificent watery splash. Now that I'll be of "age" (able to
formulate my own opinion without actually thinking), I want to clear
up a few things that have been mildly nagging at me for years, like a
scratch that never itched.
First ? the name Amphipoda is routinely butchered by many. It's
pronounced "Am-fee-pod-uh." I'm cool with Apoda or even Poda, but
calling me Ipod makes me blow chuncks. Way too trendy!
Second ? When something gets an Amphipoda spin, it is Amphipoda-ized
or under goes apodization. (i.e., when stopping your car, if you
reduce the brake pedal force just as you come to a stop, you will not
feel a "jerk" [or look like one] and the car will come to a smooth
stop. This is a form of apodization.). If you want something
apodized - just ask. I'm so chock full of BS my eyes are brown and
my nictitating membranes are pitch black.
Third ? I spend an incredible amount of time not doing the things
that nobody had ever thought of not doing. This is what makes me so
incredibly impractical on a good day and down right "finatical" on an
average day. Surly you realize what a saint my Mermaid wife is by
now.
And last ? In order to properly commemorate and celebrate this new
holiday I ask that each of you, in your own unique way, fill your
navel with the seeds of your favorite fruit and run buck naked
through the streets of the closest major metropolitan city
yelling "Happy Birthday Amphipoda!!!"? weather permitting of course.
And if that's just too much of a hassle please make a silent toast in
the direction of the nearest Amphicar.
Oh, and by all means tell your boss January 27th is an IAOC
International holiday and that you get the day off with pay.
Be well, swim safe.
Amphipoda (Am-fee-pod-uh)
'64 Turquoise (still not wet in 2006)
San Diego, CA (72 degrees)
